Let me start by saying that, a comic cannot possibly contain my ire for this kind of kinkster. That’s what blog posts are for, right?

Also, “twoo” isn’t a typo. Those who have heard me speak on the topic, or have read other, more eloquent and entertaining speeches may recognize the reference. If not, read on!

First, check out the wonderful speech by Laura Antoniou (author of the Marketplace series of books). Here’s a helpful link to get you pointed in the right direction.

You might have seen it on FetLife already, or be one of Laura Antoniou’s friends there. If so, please click back after you read the first little bit and say to yourself “hey, I’ve already seen this on FetLife. That guy is some sort of cat-whispering fucking psychic!”.

Back? Good!

Now, as I was saying. For clarification: Things were most definitely NOT better in the rather esoteric “back then”. In ye olden days, people were so tightly wound that they were barely able to ask their husband/wife of 20+ years for oral sex, lest they be thought to be a deviant and slapped with divorce papers, a restraining order (oh the irony) and forced to go door to door explaining that they are on the kinky slut-whore-devil offender list.

Okay, I’m embellishing that just a little bit, but I think you see my point.

“Back then”, Homosexual men and women were afraid to come out for fear of being beaten or even murdered! And “back then” anything other than having missionary-style sex with the lights out and the stereo playing was considered deviant and therefore “gay” which leads me back to the point I made just one sentence ago.

Now, we’re more free to talk with our partners about our sexual desires. We’re free to talk with out friends, and even get tips on how to perform certain things better! With this elevated clarity in human sexuality, people are more able to play, to varying degrees, with people they met that same night. They’re more likely to have safer sexual intercourse, they’re more empowered to say no AND yes, and they’re more apt to try new things and perhaps discover something new about themselves.

In my (and Laura Antoniou’s) not-so-humble opinion, the real problem isn’t that things aren’t what they used to be, it’s that many “ye olde guarde” members can’t stop lamenting their loss of youth long enough to look around at all the fresh, young, nubile, intelligent, free-thinking, open-minded “newbies” to see that things have, indeed, improved!

Things aren’t as great as any of us would like. We have to meet in secret (or at least the legal guise of secrecy) to meet up with others and discuss our kinks. We’re terrified of talking about our lifestyle choices to anyone we haven’t known foe 5+ years, and the legal system in many places outlaws all intercourse other than missionary (and some even stipulate that the lights have to be off and that it must happen during hours of darkness!).

The long and short of what I, and anyone else worth listening to, have been saying is this. We’ve come a long way, and things are MUCH better than they’ve ever been. But, we all have a long way to go and normalization is the key to greater acceptance and freedom.

I almost hate to do this, but what do you think? Leave me a comment, and let’s discuss it!